Saturday, May 28, 2011

On the way...

Premier Prints Zig Zag in Natural Blue


It's back in stock!

Andplusalso, for the Goose...

Swavell/Mill Creek Felton Chilli

Thursday, May 26, 2011

I'm a mush

Somehow I forgot to mention in my "about me" post that I am the world's biggest mush when it comes to anything wedding-baby-heartwarming related. Let's get this straight - I am not a baby. I don't cry at the drop of a hat, and in fact I consider myself quite the tough cookie. But catch me reading "On The Night You Were Born" to The Goose at any given time, and you will find a sobbing mess of a woman who can barely get her words out. (I kid you not, the very first time I picked the book up, I had to close it immediately out of sheer terror that I would lose it - I was at work people! Just looking at the cover had me tearing up. Paaaathetic. Moving on . . .)
So, I'm sitting here at work (tisk-tisk, blogging at work) and while looking for another file on my computer, I came across a small collection of quotes I've stashed away that are all related to motherhood and a mother's love. Again, I'm scared to even start reading because I know what looking at a computer screen through tear-filled eyes is like, and it ain't pretty (or easy to hide from passerby's).

. . . but then again, I love to torture my soul in that good-for-the-heart kind of way. So for my "pleasure", and yours (questionable) here are some of them. Mind you that I'm horrible at keeping track of authors and probably accuracy so don't consider them verbatim, for safety.

"If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been."
-Robert Brault 

"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."
-Elizabeth Stone

"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in this world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things, and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in it's path."
-Agatha Christie (I think?)

"No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you. After all, YOU are the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside."
-anonymous

"PROMISE TO MY CHILDREN: I will stalk you, freak you out, lecture you, drive you crazy, be your worst nightmare, embarrass you in front of your friends, hunt you down like a bloodhound...all until the day you understand why I do it. Then I'll know you are a responsible adult. All because I LOVE YOU. You will never find ANYONE who loves you and cares about you more than ME......your Mom"
-found on the internet, no source

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.
-        Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

these quotes are not from traditional sources, but I just fell in love with them...

from Enjoying the Small Things by Kelle Hampton
(My GOD, this woman has a way with words...and a camera)

“You feed. You change. You snuggle. You pour your soul into them, hoping every internal thought and feeling of goodness and love seeps into every bone in their body, every cell in their frame so that they feel it...so that they know it...so that someday, when they are three and they are big and they are beginning the journey down the new road, they will be equipped with everything they could possibly need to thrive."

 "With all that said, do you know how many baby showers I've been to where I've had to quickly come up with my best advice to a new mama and write it down on an index card? Never having time to think, I write the predictable. Get some sleep. Enjoy it. Take tons of pictures.
You know what? I have a well thought-out answer now. I know the best advice to write on the next card.
You have everything it takes. You just don't know it yet. Whenever you feel exhausted, confused, incapable or at your wit's end...look within. Trust your instincts."

And this last one is somewhere from within a new magazine called "Mamalode" (I would love to subscribe, but I don't get enough time to read magazines to justify the price)

"Motherhood can be very shattering, both from the pressures on the outside and the love from the inside. But there are bits that remain yours - pieces that come from your own childhood, your own adventures and your own growth. They are still there, mixed in with your family, relationships, time, money, health, passions, dreams, work, and creativity."


That wraps up the quotes. Now for the big dog. It is a poem, well known and extremely beautiful. I cannot even begin what it does to my soul. Magical. (even the most sarcastic bloggers can bring out the serious once in a while)

 
I Carry Your Heart - EE Cummings
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
 

I say that last line to Goose EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT when I'm putting him to bed. I've literally missed a total of 3 nights of bedtime since he was born. And every night, he gets a near teared mommy whispering those words into his ear as he's falling asleep.

waterworks, people. WATERWORKS!

Monday, May 23, 2011

Current Want/Need

If I took the time to list every item that I'm currently crushing on, or all of the things that we need for our house, I'd be listing until I were 6 feet in the ground.
So for now, I'm listing two that I actually plan on buying.

Fabric for Curtain/Drapery Panels

Because the three windows in our living room currently sport three different window treatments (the bay window being roman blinds, another would be a bamboo shade, and the third has some cheapo too-short and too-narrow beige linen curtains). M has been bugging me since we moved in to do something about this. For some months, it was acceptable cuz I was all knocked up and stuff. A few more were excusable because I was a new mom. But now it's just embarrasing (actually it always was, but now it's unacceptable).
I'll be buying the above fabric and no-sewing drapes. Because even the most undomestic goddess can do a little ironing. Too bad that as soon as I pulled the trigger and decided to take on this mini project, the fabric went out of stock (and by "as soon as", I literally mean hours). Says June 28th back in- I hope I don't lose my motivation by then.
(I'll be referring to this tutorial from YHL. As a side note, YHL should have been on my "obsessed with" list, because I sweat these two homeowners and all their DIY skillz.)

Another thing M has been nagging me about is to hang things on the walls. As of yet I have three beachy/shell photos in large Ikea frames, and one wedding picture. Thatisall. BigFatFail. As of last week M decided to hang is recently passed grandmother's clock. While extremely sweet and sentimental, attractive it is not. I feel like a cold ice queen for saying it, but I cannot stand it. I get the feeling he's mostly hung it in order to light a fire under my ass. Consider my ass burned b/c the very next day I was on a mission. Found these plates. Mission accomplished. I'll buy two each of the four colors and arrange them to look art-sy. Bonus points go to the name Delilah, which I love but don't know that I could actually name my child in real life (besides the fact that M would never go for it).

That's it for the moment...

Friday, May 20, 2011

Beach Bungalow Love

Just because I'm new here, and because I'll be talking about it a lot, I figure I should give you a run down of the house we bought just a little over a year ago. And by run down, I mean explaining each detail in way too many sentences.

"House" is an overstatement. We own what you could essentially call a winterized bungalow. We paid what some people would consider a redonkulous amount for such a tiny piece of bungalow love. Hell, I think it's a redonkulous amount, but I do a lot of crazy things to stay where I am. And I'll tell you why.
The Beach.
We live 5 blocks from the atlantic ocean, yet only 40 minutes from NYC - where both me and M work. Our community is ridiculously cute and friendly and it's just a truly great town. I am a beach bum, grew up across the street from the beach my entire life. To tell you the truth, I think 5 blocks from the beach is a bit too long of a walk. Yes, I've been spoiled, but I think you might now understand why we chose to live where we do.

It all really came about when we were first moving in together (after only 3 months of dating - hello crazies). We weren't sure where to live. We realized we both loved the beach.  He didn't want to live in the beach town I grew up in (and I understood why) and I didn't want to live in either of the 2 towns he grew up in (and he understood why). The town we're in now was the sweet compromise. Well, 5 years and 3 rentals later, we still loved the place and wanted to raise our kids here.
So we got hitched and put away our dreams of a big spacious home to make way for the new dreams which included a seaside bungalow with no driveway, no yard and very little space. But we always knew that was the compromise. Location for space.

And here we are, a year later, struggling a bit more than we expected with the no-space issue. I'm assuming a lot of the struggle has to do with the fact that The Goose was an early arrival. We found out we were pregnant after we went into contract, but before we closed. We weren't expecting to get pregnant so fast, and we count our lucky stars and blessings and anything else we possibly can that it happened so fast. Not to be redundant, but we're so lucky and blessed, we cannot be grateful enough. Even with all that; to say that we weren't exactly prepared to be making a nursery instead of a guestroom/office, well that's an understatement.

So here's the layout, to the best of my whip-it-together-with-what-I've-got ability. It is by no means to scale or anything important like that.
Let me explain to you some of the wonderful joys of owning a nearly 100 year old bungalow. This house is one big mess of "what the *&%$ were these people thinking!?!?!". And by these people, I'm referring to the previous owner. He was also a fireman. He was single. And apparently somewhat handy, but not completely sane. He attempted to turn this house into a bachelor pad of sorts (a money making bachelor pad, no less...but more on that in later post).
Take notice of two extreme "what the eff!?!" characteristics:
1-the house is the size of a pea, and yet half of it is taken up by one room - the master, along with it's bath. I haven't exactly labeled anything, but if you're wondering what's going on with that bath, you're not crazy. Included in this bath: one toilet, one stand up shower, one huge vanity with a miniscule sink you can barely brush your teeth in, and one jacuzzi tub. Wait, what? Yes, folks I said JACUZZI TUB. Damn thing takes up what feels like 1/4th of the room. I know I should love it, but I hate it. I'd rather have another closet . . .
2- . . . that could go in The Goose's room. Yep, that's right, Goose's room currently has no closet. It's absolute insanity. Do you know how much CRAP a baby requires? Do you know how not fun it is to have to store things everywhere but said baby's room? I do. It's a whole lot of not fun. The poor kid's room is already the size of a closet, the least we could do is provide him another one to put his crap in. Unfortunate for you, that's the breaks kiddo, sorry.
Also of noteworth mention:
-There are only two closets in the entire house, one of which is the size of my pinky nail. They're both a greyish color in the pic above - one by Goose's room, and one in our bedroom. I won't even begin to describe the wrath of hatred I have for our home's previous owner. Such a man - two goddamned closets.
-The fireplace. It is not really centered to anything. It can pass as centered to our entire Living-Dining space, but that's not even true. But it works so I try not to knock it too much.
-The two windows on each side of the fireplace. Again, not centered to anything, and that's fo' sho'. Also, they are two different lengths, widths and heights, and of different ages.
- A third window, which is currently halfway hidden by our oddly placed refrigerator in the kitchen.
- Our master bedroom has only two windows, one of which is teeny tiny and in the bathroom, another which is the front bay window. There is a very long wall with no windows that could easily sport a few to lighten things up. There is, however, a square with an A/C in it that looks like it used to be a window (no pictured - sorry I forgot).
-Not noticeable on the pic above, but still very "what the eff?": there are three countertops in the kitchen. They are made up of two different laminates. They nearly match. Call me crazy but "nearly" is not indeed the same. Me no like.
-There are three floor surfaces: carpet in the living room and Goose's room; Hardwood in the master room/bath and the small patch which designates the dining area (since it's open to the kitchen and living area); And nice travertine tile in the kitchen which is actually very nice looking. Too bad it's literally adhered right on top of the hardwood underneath and it's a good 1.5" higher than the rest of the house.
-There are some walls with not even one electric outlet, and others with about 4 in a one foot radius (I'm looking at you kitchen!)
-The lighting situation could easily be worse, but there are two oddly placed ceiling fans in the living area. I go easy on them because it seems that with the whole age and original craft of the house, there's not really any other options for them (and because I plain and simple love a ceiling fan. I realize I'm not in the majority and this makes me even crazier).
-Also not noticeable but easily the most frustrating thing about our sweet, sweet bungalow - no floor, wall, or ceiling is level, even, or flat. Everything is crooked, sloped, or annoyingly bowed.

After writing all of that (and reading it, for you) it's pretty obvious that we are completely, utterly, LITERALLY insane. And I haven't even gotten to the exterior of the house (ha!) or the whole "money-making" part of it  - which is, ironically, the reason we bought the house. More to come...

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

A little bit more about me

Yesterday, I kept it short. Today, not so much. You'll quickly learn that I am a wordy person (in the blogger world and even moreso in real life), and what better way to get you acquainted to this than blabbing all about myself (okay, so I will also be talking about about The Goose, but he's just an extension of me, so it's all the same).

I am utterly obsessed with a few things. Here they are in no particular order (except for #1, he's always gonna be my numero uno)

-The Goose - who, btw, is the cutest baby in the entire history and future of all babies. I'm not just saying this. It is a fact.
-Amazon Prime - Free shipping? Yes please! In 2 days or less? Uuummm, eff yes! Lowest prices and just about everything you're looking to buy? Let's get married.
-Chocolate - I must have some every day. This is not an exaggeration. Chocolate is like air to me. It can be eaten as a snack, as breakfast, as a drink. Whatever. Gimmesomerightnow. Everyday.
-Breastmilk (if you're not into baby stuff and how they are fed, then just cancel out this window and never come back) Obvs, not for me, but for Goose. I don't actually breastfeed, I pump. I'm crazy like that, but I am completely OCD about getting enough, how many bottles are always on hand, how much of a stash I have (we literally bought a deep freezer because of how large it is) and all that fun stuff. Apparently I not only accept being a cow, I live for it.
- Eating - I am consumed by consumption. No, I am not a foodie. I don't love trying new things, don't have an expansive palate, enjoy the same ole things, and love just about everything I'm not supposed to. I just love to eat. At breakfast I am thinking about lunch. Lunch, I'm thinking about dinner...and so on. I live to eat, for sure.
-Happiness - Sounds simple. It is. In everything I do, I try to find happiness. I fail at it a lot of the time, but I'm awesome at it in other ways. This blog will cover a lot of what I'm trying to change in my life right now to get there, career and otherwise.

Now that we've established those few quirks, let's move on to the boring, finer details of my personality. I wish I knew where to begin.
I am what I've come to know as a stubborn Irish lass. I love to drink alcohol (or did, now that I'm a cow and all) and am very good at it. I am ruthlessly stubborn and my husband, M, takes the brunt of it (though no one and nothing is safe, to be honest). I am strong minded and sometimes nuerotic, but overall I think I'm a pretty laid back person and try to go with the flow (is that even possible?). My personality is very different from who I was growing up. I was quiet and shy without a care in the world - literally. But add a little age and apparently I become a loud and anal alcoholic. I might be overexaggerating, but I'm just trying to boil it down to fact here, folks.
I love M with every fiber of my being, though I'm not the best at always showing it. He's literally the man I dreamt about as a little girl and I don't think there is anyone else in this world that could love me (or put up with me) just the way that he does. I am, quite honestly, the luckiest girl in the world. I should mention this to him I suppose, huh?
The Goose is literally the reason I was born, I am convinced. He's my every thought and emotion and I don't know how I went through the past 27 years of my life not knowing him. My soul is intertwined with his and I am a better person for having birthed him. He's my life, my love, my everything. He made me a mother and I am so grateful that this little being found me.
Okay, sapfest over.
I love bad reality TV, like all those housewives shows. But, to balance it out, I also love to read. I am NOT an athletic or outdoorsy person (unless you count the beach). I will take laying-on-the-couch-with-remote-in-hand over put-on-sneakers-and-go-for-a-walk just about anyday. Unless you guilt me because it's a nice day out. Guilt about good weather almost always works. I hate to excersize and just about never do. I mean it. I'm pretty unhealthy. I'm sure it will bite me in the ass in the near future, but for right now I'm happy.
I've always loved creative things, but somehow ended up in the most uncreative line of work possible - exec assistant in a business media company. I'm lucky because my boss is the nicest man alive, which is rare because he's "kind of a big deal". Generally, before the Goose came into my life, I was happy with work. Now, the thought of spending so much time away from him doing something that I don't absolutely love and have a passion for...well, it's soul sucking. So, I'm just now starting to make some changes. In the meantime, it's Daddy daycare and Grandmas hugs that get my boy through the workweek. Luckily I only work 4 days a week (four 13-14 hour mothereffing days, but whose counting?)

I think I've word vomitted enough about myself for one sitting, no? I think yes. More to come.
In the meantime, check out my Pinterest to see my other obsessions and for some glorious eye candy.

And if you made it through all of that you deserve more than a cookie, so here
Cookies and Cream Oreo Fudge Brownies Recipe
via Kevin&Amanda

Monday, May 16, 2011

No promises

Here it is. The first post. I'll keep it short. ish.

I married M the end August of '09. We went into contract on our first home in November of '09. January 23rd twenty-ten I peed on a stick (not to be gross or anything) and saw two lines. I happened to pee on four more sticks to make the shock subside, but I digress. On February 25th twenty-ten we officially became homeowners.

We didn't realize how fast life was coming at us, but we welcomed the excitement.

On October 7th 2010, our lives completely changed. Our little butterball aka "The Goose" (whatevs, it worked for the guy in Top Gun, which by the way is an awesome movie) blessed us by showing up fashionably late and totally on his own terms.

Here you will find what now exists as a result of all of the aforementioned events. I make no promises as to how good of a read it will be. Only one way to find out...